This summer, I went to a restaurant with my friends for the first time. We ate delicious pasta for a mere seven dollars and my friend gorged herself on a giant salami pizza. We feasted and talked and I don't know how, but my friend told me something she'd overheard once.
There are two people in my year who've been dating forever. Once, my friend overheard the girl complaining, mildly distressed, about the way her boyfriend would kiss her with his tongue all the way into her mouth and how she didn't like that. To her friends. And mine brushed it off. Giggled even. I was a little appalled hearing this, but I didn't want to make a scene. Though in retrospect, I wish I had made a tiny, inconspicuous scene. I wish I'd told them very sternly that if something like that was ever the case with them, they shouldn't complain about it to their friends, but talk to their boyfriends. And every time I remember this, I feel sad. I need someone to tell my friends that even when people kiss, the act and its details should be consented to by both parties.
Justification: Not granted
Anthem: Dear Wormwood by The Oh Hellos
Rating: *****
Risk: XXX
Review: This is really the best possible start to the following months. Not only because there's such a long list of accusations or because it's such a recent challenge (2014), but because I loved it. A lot of people whom I've seen reviews from are already out of high school. I'm not, and I'm absolutely a wallflower. I can still relate to Charlie within this phase of life. In fact, we're practically the same age, since I'll be turning sixteen in December.
There're also parts I can't relate to. I have vastly different problems, and vastly different friends. I've never touched a cigarette and never will. That's part of why I like these frank contemporaries so much, though. I can peek into a life I'll never live.
The way Chbosky deals with hard things is admirable. From rape to drugs, everything is described from Charlie's unique narrative. There's no lecturing. Instead, the author treats his reader as an equal.
I loved everything from top to bottom, but when I finished last night, I wasn't sure about the ending. After a night of sleep, though, I like it much better.
If I had to compare, I think this book comes closest to Looking For Alaska in atmosphere and story.
The following will contain spoilers for The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
Also non-graphic discussion of suicide.
Also non-graphic discussion of suicide.
Drugs/alcohol/smoking
There's lots of all of the above in this book. From pot to cigarettes to brandy, there's plenty for everyone. And to keep this post transparent, I have to admit that I always have an urge to live 'a wild life' after finishing this type of book. That wish never lasts long, though, Yeah, I'm curious what life looks like through the glasses of LSD, but I don't want schizophrenia. Easy calculation to make. Just like smoking might seem appealing sometimes, until you remember a smoker's lungs smell even worse than his clothes. Yes, I was mildly tempted to go drink with the popular kids in Berlin, but I realized my keen mind is all I have and that I shouldn't damage it. It's okay to have a sip of the wild life of teenagers sometimes, as long as the reader has morals and common sense.
Homosexuality
I loved the romance between Brad and Patrick! Sorry, that's probably not the constructive thing you wanted to hear. I don't understand why you would ban your child from reading about homosexuality, even if you are 'against it'. It's an existing thing in our world. The best way to introduce teens to the real world is giving them a good introductory read.
Admittedly, if you planned to ban all books depicting homosexuality, this one should be at the top of your list. Especially problematic to conservative parents would be Patrick kissing Charlie and taking him to that park where men had sex. But I think it makes a difference that the former is an important lesson for Charlie later on, when Sam tells him to tell people what he needs. The latter is something that exists, and I don't think describing the real world should be prohibited.
Offensive language
This is going to sound weird, but in case of The Perks, don't you have more pressing matters to attend to? I'm dead serious here. This is perhaps the most controversial book I have ever had my hands on and you complain about a handful of Fucks? I'm reading The Tempest in English class, and from what I gather, Shakespeare's word choice is more graphic than this. I also think you underestimate your child's vocabulary.
Religious viewpoint
WHAT?! The MC is a Christian! He mentions God multiple times in a positive sense. What more could you ask for, American Religious Community? I get that the lifestyle choices Charlie makes are questionable in a religious context, but that's no excuse. If those bother you, join the secularists and challenge it for sex or drugs or suicide. I guess this one has to do with Patrick and his sister's abortion, but we discuss those under different headings.
Sexually explicit
There's some quite explicit sex in this book. Not fanfic explicit, but for a YA novel it's still quite graphic. Men go to a park to have anonymous sex, the MC witnesses a date rape, he also sees his sister having sex with her boyfriend, and has been sexually abused in his early childhood. Basically, we're talking ridiculously openly about all those topics parents dislike speaking of.
The fact of the matter is, though, that it wasn't much new to me, and it was far from arousing. Parents ought to know that their children will always be a little more informed than they('d like to) believe. You will have told them some, their school will have told them some, and then there's that spooky grey area containing friends, fanfics, and Tumblr. And I know that sounds terrifying now, but try to remember your own youth. Try to remember how you went through the same thing (without Tumblr and fanfics, then) and didn't turn out a perverted creep.
And if the messages entailing the sexual explicity were awful, at least your fear would be justified. But it's not. And school never taught me about date rape and victim blaming, and I'm mad about that. At some moments, I'm so glad Tumblr and books like these tell me what to look out for, because my teachers and parents didn't. We were taught about lover boys in Religion, and only because my teacher found it important enough to abandon her curriculum. But no one taught me about rape, except Tumblr and poetry slams and books. Stories are vital to our discovery of the adult world, so allow us to read. Allow us to explore the themes you are hesitant to educate us about.
Unsuited for age group
I'll admit this is a mandatory read for eleventh grade, not sixth. The abundances of sex and alcohol and even just the thematic substance would be a tad too heavy for the average thirteen-year-old. Also, I think permission slips are in order in this case.
Anti-family
Ah, abortion, another way to plunge your novel onto the Banned Books Top 10. Moreover, the scene depicting this part of the book was cut out because it would've changed the rating to R. The same goes for the smoking and the suicide poem.
Suicide
I think it's a shame this is even a reason to ban a book. You see that graph? You realize what a shameful graph this is? The age group 19-25 has a percentage of 25% for males. 25% of guys dying between those ages killed themselves. Suicide is not something you are allowed to ban from your youngsters because they have already appropriated it. At my age, most teens will already have experienced someone committing suicide. A friend's cousin. A teacher's parent. A family friend. Suicide is as real as the fingers typing this post, as the eyes reading it. No one has the right to pretend this act of despair is not real or a taboo. For a taboo is ten times the weight of a secret. A secret means you refuse to tell someone. A taboo means someone refuses to hear you.
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